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A couple has a dog that snores. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles and he will stop snoring. "Yeah right" she says. A few minutes after going to bed that night, the dog begins to snore as usual. The wife tosses and turns, unable to sleep, muttering to herself, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of ribbon and ties it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stops snoring. The woman is amazed! The next night, the husband comes home drunk after being out late with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep, and begins snoring loudly. The woman thinks, maybe the ribbon will work on him, so she goes to the closet again, grabs a piece of ribbon, and ties it around her husband's testicles, amazingly, it also works on him! The woman sleeps soundly. The husband wakes from his drunken stupor and stumbles into the bathroom. He stands in front of the toilet, glances in the mirror and sees a blue ribbon attached to his privates. He is very confused and, as he walks back into the bedroom, he sees a red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles. He shakes his head and looks at the dog and says, "I don't know where we were or what we did last night, but by God, we got first and second place."
1 Comments:
At 8:57 PM, Steven said…
An old man and and his wife went to the doctor's office for the man's annual checkup. The old man complained that lately he has been losing his hearing and he has been having stomach cramps. The doctor tells him that he will have to take some tests and he told the old man that he needed a urine, stool and semen sample.
The old man asked his wife, "What did he say?"
The wife replied, "He wants your underwear."
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